According to my plans and desires, I should have just gotten home from Africa. But I didn't. And that's okay. Instead I am spending time with good friends and pastors in Ohio, something I probably wouldn't have taken time off work for. Despite being heartbroken and discouraged about Africa, my heart is full of peace.
Peace in our Father is something I have been continually chasing after for years. It can seem so far away at times, and other times it's just right there. When I get into tough situations or things don't go the way I thought God wanted (like Africa), I run to God and ask for his peace and comfort to cover me. Well, I try to do this every time. It doesn't always work out that way. There are times when I get angry at God and just cry out "Why?!". But I've learned a very important lesson about God through these outbursts and tears.
The why doesn't really matter, it's the who. And that who is our Heavenly Father who loves us SO much that he sacrificed his son, who spins the galaxies in perfect harmony and placed each star thoughtful in the sky, who breathed life into the Earth and spoke the universe into existence. He is PERFECT in all his ways and wants nothing more than to see us joyfully and willfully chasing after him.
"Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
All we have to do is go to him. That's it. Jesus I need you. Give me peace in the midst of the unknown. I don't understand what's happrning, but you do so I know that everything will be okay. Thank you for your love, grace,and peace. All of which I don't deserve. Thank you for your sacrifice and paying the price for my life. I love you and am chasing after your heart.
Much love + blessings,
Becky
